SoarDash
by MuffinzRule
Summary: All her friends are too busy hanging out with their coltfriends. Love seems too much of a hassle - it would just get in the way of the goal of her life. But when Nokomis strikes Equestria, RD needs a little more than her lovestruck friends to defeat her..
1. Chapter 1: Crash Landing Much?

**Me: Hello everybody!  
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**Fang: To those who don't know me, fear my name! For I, the great Black-Furred Fang, is the polar bear of LMWOE!**

**Max: Meh. Hi. Max. A polar bear.**

**Me: Yeah, these are Max and Fang, my polar bears! They will be the co-producers of this fanfic – **

**Fang: Only ****CO****?**

**Me: Dude, who's writing this thing?**

**Fang: *****mutters something obscene*******

**Chapter 1**

_Rainbow Dash's POV_

I yawn. The cloud furniture in my home doesn't move or talk – yet I am staring at it intensely… It's been ages since I've seen my friends around. I guess I could call them by pony phone…

"Hello?" I ask. "Hello? Twilight?" I speak into my phone, my voice sounding waaaaay too loud after being in silence for so long…

"Um… Hey. I'm sorta busy today. Sorry, Dashie, but I have to – "

"Yeah, yeah, go hang out with Asterisk. Shaky. Whoever that is." I growl a little as I say his name. Ever since all my friends started getting coltfriends they've been completely and utterly horny and giggly… even Twilight, the sensible one, had forgotten to call and meet up as friends.

"Sorry."

"Iz alright," I mutter. "Bye, I guess."

_A WHILE LATER -_

I stop by at Sugarcube Corner after a long time of practicing. I was actually pretty pleased with myself, creating three different new moves – the Ferris Wheel, the Tsunami, and finally, my favourite, the Soarwing. Named after Soarin', one of my idols of course.

"Hey~ Dashie!" Pinkie squeals. I have to crack a smile; the energy of Pinkie is rubbing off on me. Also, Pinkie's the only other one without a coltfriend. She doesn't even want one, which is a little comforting.

"Is it just me or does no one come to my parties anymore?" she complains. "I've tried EVERYTHING! Free cupcakes, free cupcakes, and free cupcakes! Oh, and did I mention free cupcakes?" I sigh. Even though Pinkie's a nice friend, she definitely doesn't have the same interests as me.

"Anyways… I guess I'll see ya 'roun – " I get interrupted by my phone ringing. I almost break into a smile, but Rainbow Dash never does that…

"Hello?" I ask cheerfully into the phone. Maybe it's Twilight, saying we might have some spare time together. Or Applejack, saying we can have another iron pony contest.

"Heeeey. This be R-Dash, hey?" This time I really do break into a grin.

"Spitfire? Hey! Nice hearing ya again. We haven't practiced for a while. Should we do that soon? Tomorrow maybe?"

"Sorries, RD, but greater things are here tonight. Y'know Soarin'?" Spitfire's voice slides smooth like butter.

"Yeah? The colt who I saved the pie for?"

"Eeeeeeeyup. He's my coltfriend now!" I gasp, being the fanfilly I am.

"OH MY BUCKING CELESTIA!" I shriek.

"No need to freak out, RD," snickers Spitfire. "All cool, y'know? Anyways, we holdin' a party for all the Wonderbolts and I was wonderin' if ya and your friends will come."

"Without a doubt, we'll be coming," I say, brighter than ever. "Is it okay if they bring their coltfriends too?"

Spitfire laughs. Her laugh sounds a little like a whale. "Eeeeeeeyup. Just fine. Anyways, see ya at Brinkstone Bar at 8:00 PM."

"Totally!" I exclaim. "Bye!"

"Byesoossss," Spitfire says. A faint _beep _as my phone hangs up.

"YEEEESSSSSS!" I yell. I fly loop-de-loops everywhere and even do my new move, the Ferris Wheel.

"Am I invited? It's a party, isn't it? Wait, is everyone else coming?" blabbers Pinkie Pie. She jumps extra high with every syllable.

"Yes! Everyone's coming," I say excitedly. "A chance for dinner with the Wonderbolts! It's a dream come true! And believe it or not, Spitfire's coltfriend is now Soarin'!"

"Who the Celestia is Soarin'?" Pinkie Pie shouts over my excitement. She stuffs a multi-colored cupcake in her mouth, spraying crumbs everywhere when she talks.

"Only one of the best of the Wonderbolts!" I squeal. Okay, totally out of character. Me, the best flier in Equestria, Rainbow Dash, squealing? Really?

"I'm calling _everyone_." I'm almost singing as I fly swiftly past Sugarcube Corner, going home to figure out what I'll wear and stuff. Wait, huh? That's a Rarity thing… fine; I'll go naked as usual. Nah, I can't do that! Too informal…

"Oof!" I squeak a little as I smash into Applejack's barn. Oh well. Bucking barn.

"Applejack! APPLEJACK!" I howl into it.

"Hey RD! That you out there?" she hollers back. "Sorry, Tiger, but I'll have to answer the door!" I roll my eyes. Tiger's her coltfriend's nickname. He's my favourite of the bunch, though. I can't stand Rarity's coltfriend, though, even though Tiger and him are best friends.

"Hey! Applejack! We're all invited to the Wonderbolts' dinner! They're celebrating Soarin' and Spitfire's get together, y'know?"

"I'm totally coming!" Applejack calls.

"Brinkstone Bar, 8:00 PM. Don't forget Tiger! And go see Rarity. And call Twilight and Fluttershy. I'm so bucking excited!"

"Language," sighs Applejack sternly. I stick out my tongue.

"Thanks, _mother_."

"Ew. Now that I have Tiger, that's grosser than ever before…" I burst out laughing. Oh, Applejack. That friend of mine.

"See ya there!"

_ANOTHER WHILE LATER-_

_Soarin's' POV_

I smirk slyly at Spitfire. She avoids my gaze, almost trying to get rid of the immaturity that sits beside her. I take my hoof and rub it against the side of the glass, making a faint _ring _sound.

"For the love of Celestia, Soarin'," she groans. "Can you _please_ act at least slightly mature around our friends?"

"Hey, that's why they're my friends," I defend myself. "They _know_ I'm weird and stuff." I grab a muffin, which Derpy Hooves looks at longingly – the last blueberry muffin. I throw it at her and she gulps it down in one mouthful. With a lopsided grin, she trots away to go snarf more muffins.

"You forgot _my_ friends," Spitfire huffs. "So act your age." I snort.

"_Soarin'_," she whines. I roll my eyes. Spitfire's a great gal and all, except I get kinda tired of her moaning and whining all the time.

"Hey, there are some good-looking mares here, hey? Look at R-Dash over there. You won't believe how pretty she looks…" Spitfire literally snarls and whips a foreleg to my face.

"Whoa, whoa," I say, putting both my forelegs up. "Just a joke." Spitfire looks at me disdainfully and then walks over to her friends.

I sigh, sitting my rump down in a seat. Jeez, she really needs to loosen up a bit. Ever since we… I guess "got together", as Spitfire puts it, I've been more stressed out than ever. Trying to please her all time is just putting my mind on haywire.

Speaking of hay, I could really have some.

_Rainbow Dash's POV_

I sit cordially wearing another beautiful dress, complete with silver lightning shoes. Perfect. Rarity always knows this stuff.

I munch on some celery sticks, delicious. So crunchy… I love Brinkstone Bar. I ordered practically everything on the menu. I have enough money, anyways. I got a raise at work.

I watch as Spitfire takes a spoon and clinks it against the side of her glass as I gulp down the last of my food.

"Hello! I am just thanking everypony for being such a kind soul and coming along to celebrate Soarin' and my get together. I hope you enjoyed the dinner. I was just hoping you could stay a little while, Soarin' and I are about to put on a show!" I gasp again. I've seen the Wonderbolts… let's see, five times now. Six to count this one.

"Hey, R-Dash!" calls out Soarin'. "Spitfire says we've practiced your routine, so I was wondering… let's do this show together!"

"!" I scream. "Yes!" 

Soarin' nods, and at that exact moment I slice through the air, rainbow trailing behind me. We do the Flame, the Windwaker, and the Supersmash. Spitfire beckons to Soarin' and then they create a heart out of their lightning bolts.

With a blinding flash, I slice through the heart, creating a rainbow arrow. I then spin around and start another Sonic Rainboom.

"_Epicness for the win," _I think.

_Soarin's' POV_

"Rainbow! NO!" I yell. She's started the Sonic Rainboom at the wrong angle. If she continues, she could bucking _die_.

I start flying impossibly fast towards her, trying to make her stop.

"RAINBOW!" She can't hear me, she can't hear me…

BOOM!

A rainbow does trail out in a giant mushroom cloud fashion, but I can't see Rainbow Dash.

"RAINBOW DASH!" I scream. I fly haphazardly over the land, searching for her. Nothing. Nothing.

Nothing.

Wait… yes! I found her!

She's about a mile from the site of her Sonic Rainboom.

"Rainbow Dash!" I scold. "You could have _died _for Celestia's sake!"

"Celestia's got nothing to do with it," she grumbles. She tries to stand up, but I can already tell she can't support herself. She grunts, rolls over a bit. Then, with a mighty flap of her wings, she whips herself into the air.

Only to collapse onto the ground.

"Ow." It probably hurt more than what she's showing.

"Look Rainbow, I'll help you get back to the bar, 'kay? Now stay," I say worriedly.

"I don't need your help," she groans. "No. Pony's. Help."

And then she faints.

_Rainbow Dash's POV_

Ouch. It hurts a lot.

"Hello?" Soarin' is speaking into his pony phone.

"Yes, get here for bucking sake. She's almost half-dead, idiots!" I slowly, slowly start to regain consciousness.

"WHAT IN CELESTIA'S NAME IS WRONG WITH YOU!" he snarls. "JUST GET THE BUCK OVER HERE!"

I moan, and this makes Soarin' turn to me.

"Stay with me, R-Dash. You're gonna be okay." He says it so gently, I just flop onto the ground.

Faint _whee-oh_ in the distance. And it gets louder. And louder.

"State emergency."

"Just get her in and I'll tell you later, buckhead!" At this, I feel a slight sensation of being lifted.

And black out. Again…

_Soarin's' POV_

She's going to be okay. Okay to be okay… oh Celestia, what if she doesn't make it?

"Rainbow, don't die. Don't die on me, Rainbow!" I groan. All these white ponies wearing all these white coats… creeping me out…

I pace back and forth across the shiny, blinding floor of Gets-Better Hospital. A doctor comes up and gently turns me by the shoulder.

"Ahem. Well, Soarin', your companion here –" The doctor starts.

"Get to the buckin' point," I groan.

"She's suffering from; ahem; some broken ribs, broken wing, broken foreleg. She also has some minor scratches, but we've fixed those up." The doctor pony nervously jumps around, as if he got ants in his coat.

"Okay, on a rating from 1 to 10, tell me the chances of surviving?"

"9.9. She's definitely going to survive. What worries me is that her home is in the sky, no? How will she get up there? And even if she is carried somehow, she will need a caregiver at all times."

"She can stay at my place," I say. I almost clap my hoof over my mouth. What am I saying?

"Are you sure? I know you are a Wonderbolt and all. Work complications may -"

"I think Squadron Two will be good without me for a while," I say. "And Spitfire… she practically lives with me. She could take care of her also."

"Good. Her health is stable, but we'll keep her here for the night. Unfortunately, she doesn't seem to like it here in the hospital very much…"

I smirk. Oh, Rainbow.

_Twilight's POV_

"Is Rainbow okay?" I practically shout into my pony phone.

"She's just waking up," soothes Asterisk. "Do you want me to carry you over to the hospital? My wings still have life in them."

"No, no," I say. "I can't do that! You'll be too tired, Asterisk. In fact, I think you should stay at my place in the library. Your home is simply too far away for you to fly to from the hospital after such a wreck of a night."

"Right then, I'll do just that… Be careful, Twi. I don't want any pony – "

"I'll be fine, Asterisk. I'm not helpless. But it's sweet of you to care." I smile to myself a little. He is really sweet.

"Bye then, T. See you later!"

"Bye, Shaky."

**Me: Word count: 1995. I promise to make even longer chappies in the future!**

**Fang: HA HA! The cookies have been doubled!**

**Max: Fang, I've just made two.**

**Fang's Therapist: Sorry I'm late! Hey Fangy!**

**Max: *****snickers***

**Fang: Hey Holly! Let's have some sarsaparilla!**

**Holly: Sorry, luv, but I have a little bit of a busy schedule with you today. We have to go over sitting in a bus, don't we?**

**Fang: Oh yeah! I wanna see the bus!**

**Holly: Of course, luv. *whispers* **_**I'll get him out of here.**_

**Me: Course. Thanks Holly!**

**Holly and Fang: *leaves***

**Max: I hope this one's better than the last.**

**Me: She BETTER be better. I'm paying 'bout fifty bucks extra every session!**

**Max: What can I say? He's an expensive polar bear.**

**Me: Last year, the total cost of Artic Chill smoothies cost $4596! And don't get me started on the Timmy's Blizzard donuts…**


	2. Chapter 2: Soarin's House Chap? No

**Me: Okay, breathe in and out… :-D**

**Me: Alrighty then! Happy news now! I will be writing this fanfic in third person from now on. It's just too confusing if I put it first person. Thank you to one of the people who reviewed and gave me this advice! Soup is great!**

**Fang: Nom nom nom nom nom nom nom…**

**Me: Don't tell me you're watching that video again.**

**Fang: But the gazelle is so ADORABLE! Ahhhhhhh!**

**Me: That is the highest I have ever heard your voice go.**

**Fang: Our voices can go as high as we want them too, right Max? We're in your imagination, author.**

**Me: That doesn't stop you from clogging my head during math tests! You had yelling match over the TV during Science! No wonder I got a 99 on that test…**

**Fang: *muttering* Stupid perfectionist.**

**Max: *yawns* 99 this, 99 that. Hell, I graduated out of Polar Bear High with Cs for marks…**

**Fang: I dropped out.**

**Me: o_O I don't wanna know where you guys make schools and homes and icicle shops…**

**Fang: Icicle shops were popular until they realized how smoking an icicle is really bad for you…**

**Me: How the buck can you smoke an icicle? -_-**

**Max: Um. Sorry, but does it matter if this author's note is dragging ON and ON and ON and ON and ON and ON and ON and ON and ON – **

**Me: Shut up, please! Now, let's get this chappie rolling!**

**Fang: I GET LAST WOR- *curtains close***

**Max: Okay, okay, WHO PUT IN THE BUCKING CURTAINS?**

**Chapter 2**

Rainbow Dash blinks her eyes, heavy with sleep. Whiteness is all she can see… and she had the weirdest dream ever…. Something about gummy bears…

"Hey! RD! You alive or what?" Familiar voice. Wait, is that…

Rainbow leaps out of bed – or tries to. The light cobalt and dark blue mass holds her down. Soarin' sighs as he presses the mess of cyan and rainbow. The doctor said that her wings wouldn't be able to take off for weeks. A big upset for a Wonderbolts fan, of course.

"Wait, how – what – huh?" Rainbow Dash asks, disoriented. "I can't… move wings…" Her muscles feel slightly numb and her breathing is fast.

"They're broken," Soarin' says calmly. _Best to approach this nicely, _he thinks. He nervously paces back and forth across the blue-tiled floor. Rainbow shifts in her white bed.

"Your house is a little far away for you to walk, so you'll be staying at my place until you can fly so I can take care of you and stuff. Even if you got home by ambulance, you would have trouble taking care of yourself because of your ribs…" Soarin' trails off. Would Rainbow accept help? She's not the easiest to deal with.

Rainbow Dash looks a little confused, a little frustrated, a little upset, but then she smiles when Soarin' messes up. He looked so… awks. Tousled hair, lopsided smile, eyes in all directions.

"Cool with me, just get me out of this bucking hospital," she replies. "I can't stand these nurses." She starts in a mocking voice.

"Oh, hello there Felicia! My _goodness_, Carrie, how _have _you been! Oh, look at that _phenomenal _sweater you're wearing…" Soarin' snickers a bit. The voice reminds him of Spitfire when she gets all whiny.

"I don't think they're smart enough to know a long enough word as _phenomenal_, Dashie. Anyways, you're wish is my command." Soarin' winks at her and all of a sudden lunges and is carrying her on his back.

"That's not what I meant!" shrieks Rainbow, but she's laughing too hard to get real words to come out. Soarin' grins and jumps out the open window.

"What are you doing, breaking me out of a prison cell?" Rainbow gasps and she slips off a little and Soarin' struggles to get her back up. They're both in an awkward position.

"Uh…" Soarin' mutters. "Hang on, for Celestia's sake! Yes, grab my neck. There! Now I can finally fly you without you flopping around like a dying seal."

"Dying seal!" says Rainbow in mock outrage. "Says the one who was flying around like a deranged squirrel!" Soarin' flips onto his back so that Rainbow 's on his underside. He starts tickling her so hard, she starts gasping.

"Stop… stop!" she giggles.

"Who's a deranged squirrel?" he challenges playfully.

"Nobody…" Rainbow flops over and Soarin' flips again.

"Good," he laughs. Rainbow starts laughing too, until their laughs seem to fill the night air. Soarin' hasn't felt this free and good since… well, since Spitfire hooked up with him.

"Guess that's your house right there?" Rainbow asks.

"Eeeeeeeyup."

Meanwhile, back at Celestia's palace, something seemed to still the night air and crush it heavily, sucking the stars' brightness to their core. Luna had feared this night, dreaded it, even when trapped on the moon.

"Celestia! I must speak with you! Sister!" calls Luna. Her face is etched with worry, lines that tell of no sleep and no peace. She paces back and forth on the red carpet of the library.

"Young sister Luna, whatever is the matter?" asks Celestia. "I did feel something strange in the night, almost as strange as a week before this." Her puzzled look becomes compassionate.

"Luna, is something troubling you? The night is not… as lively as it used to be."

Luna bows her head. _She doesn't know! I knew I should have told her!_

"Celestia… I have something grave to tell you. Something so great, perhaps that we may need help from… another… world. Dimension." Luna's voice cracks under the pressure of the words she carries. Celestia stifles a snort.

"But… that is absurd!" exclaims Celestia. _Ouch, that came out wrong. _Celestia winces as Luna's expression falls from fear to disappointment to anger.

"There is something I must tell you, dear older sister," Luna says, her voice hollow and taut. "Nokomis has – "

Celestia's eyes narrow. "Nokomis? Daughter of the moon?" _Is she implying…?_

Luna swallows. "Yes, sister. But what really concerns moe… is her part in the destruction of this world." _I have to tell her._

Celestia snorts, but not disrespectfully. "Luna, have you been having too much hay late at night? Do you have thistledown for brains? This "destruction" was commanded to attention by Yadonids the Great hundreds of years ago."

Luna almost shrieks as laughter and thunder erupts from the sky. Celestia herself jumps and shakes her mane in embarrassment. The windows fly open and storm clouds roll in. Wind shrieks by the panes.

"Celestia! We must bring in the humans!" Luna cries urgently. The storm makes all voices sound quiet.

"Luna, we know NOTHING about humans!" Celestia yells over the wind. She climbs over a bookcase, one about gardening and soil temperature. She closes the noise-hungry windows and seats herself on the case.

_We have to do it now!_

Steadying herself, Luna aims her night magic at the bookcase of baking dishes. Celestia, alarmed, sends out a burst of magic herself, creating the portal – almost by accident.

"No, not that one. Not that one either. Where are the humans?" Luna mutters. Celestia snorts.

"Check number 53." Surprisingly enough, that was the dimension.

"What the buck, Celestia," murmurs Luna. "Have you memorized all the dimensions or something?"

"Maybe. Sort of. In my spare time." Celestia shakes off the incredulous look that Luna gives her.

"Uh… I guess the Elements of Harmony need to be called?" asks Celestia.

"The Wonderbolts also," says the Luna. "Call in the Wonderbolts, but only bring Squadron 2 to travel with the Elements. The others we need for different reasons."

"What? Why?" demands Celestia. "You haven't had another dream from –"

Luna nods. "I saw blood, Celestia. Blood that would be spilled if Nokomis is not captured. Your ponies… Canterlot… Ponyville…

Celestia freezes. Ponyville! The Elements! Twilight! No matter what really stood in her way, her star pupil Twilight came first. Ever since Twilight's parents had died in Discord's fiery recount, Celestia had felt a maternal connection to her pupil.

"It means war, Celestia. War against Nokomis."

It is nearly midnight when Twilight closes her book.

_Beep. Beep._

Twilight smiles as she checks the message.

"Luncheon tomorrow? Discussion on Calculus. Hope you'll be there! :3" ~ Shaky

Twilight sighs. Her cup of tea is grasped between her hooves.

Suddenly, laughter and thunder seem to split the sky open. Twilight shrieks in horror and her eyes minimize to a tiny size.

_Rain. Blood rain._

Red blood pelts down from the skies, seeming to flood Ponyville. Claws slash at her face, teeth gnashing through ponies' necks. She is in the midst of the heat of the battle.

No matter how hard they defend themselves, the horrible monsters seem to drop through the storm clouds. They seem almost in-pony. Metal spikes stick out of blubbery fat, so when the ponies attack, the blubber can protect its insides. Razor sharp knives are included in their tools, a variety of torture instruments.

She turns around. Her warm, safe library is gone. Instead, there are dead ponies, shrieking in pain. Their blood fills her hooves, making them sticky and red.

_If the two do not come_

_Their souls will be safe_

Lightning flashes, blinding her, only to open her eyes and find impaled ponies. She backs away in horror, her mouth opened in a silent scream. She turns around, and she sees instead of Canterlot's waterfall, a sea of blood red.

_But blood will run from_

_The skies above_

_So the land will run crimson_

_Stained with the sins of the six_

The six.

"Do ya think she's all right, y'all?" asks Applejack worriedly.

"I dunno, looks like she's spinning loops to me!" giggles Pinkie.

Then, she gasps. "Maybe she has Iloveicecreamwaytoomuchitis!" **(AN: Not my idea! I got it from the author of a Warriors series parody.)**

"…"

Rarity raises one eyebrow and says, "Seriously, anyone who doesn't need to be here shouldn't be. You're crowding her!"

"First Rainbow, now Twilight," snorts Spike. "Who next? Celesti – BURRRRRRPPPPP!"

A green flame spouts from his mouth and a scroll materializes out of thin air. The label reads "L" instead of the regular "C" for Celestia.

"_Dear Elements,_" Spike reads.

"_I have to warn you about upcoming danger – you must come to Canterlot Castle immediately. If Twilight is feeling alright, she may be able to teleport you there. If she is not, Squadron 2 of the Wonderbolts are to pick you up in two minutes. They will be carrying carts._

_This is not a laughing matter. You shall need all the strength you have gathered as friends. Spike, you must come on the journey that these six ponies have to embark upon." _Spike's eyebrows shoot upwards, but says nothing.

"_I shall speak to you more about this topic in vast detail, once you arrive. I must also say that when you arrive you may be greeted by strange beings. Their help will be necessary on your journey. Do not bring anything with you – Clothing is fine, but anything else can be supplied by the Castle. If you need anything sentimental, bring it now as you may not see your homes for a very long time._"

"_Say your goodbyes to family and friends, I will see you shortly._

_Sincerely, Princess Luna._"

"What now?" asks Applejack crossly. "Twi'light isn't gonna get on up anyti'me soon, is sh'e? Guess we wait for those darn apple'whippers Wonderbolts." 

"Urgh…" groans Twilight, shaking her head. Her mane falls into place.

"Twilight, um, are you okay?" asks Fluttershy. She's holding a basket of medical supplies in her hooves.

"We must tell Celestia!" cries Twilight. She throws herself upwards, eyes wide. She looks around the library, as if the red and green books were unfamiliar to her.

"How long did I sleep for?" she demands. She paces back and forth, stars spinning before her eyes.

"A short time. It's been only eight hours or so since midnight, which is when you passed out. Good thing ol' Fluttershy was here to give you a packet of cookies!"

Pinkie Pie smiles happily. "I told you my baking desserts could save lives!"

Twilight smiles awkwardly, turning it into a grimace. "I had a dream. I think it was a message. I don't remember it all, but we must tell Celestia!"

"Don't worry, sugarcube," soothes Applejack. "Luna sent a letter to us saying we are to go to Canterlot Castle. Whateve' message you got must have been sent to the princesses as well."

_Flap! Flap!_

"Here they are now!"

It was the holidays back in Toronto.

"Do the essay! And don't forget your math!"

"Yes, mom," sighs Kathy. _Asian parents._

Kathy picks up her pencil, bored to death.

Only to find a light glows behind, blindingly. She whips around, pencil in hand.

"Princess Luna?" she asks disbelievingly. She shakes her head. "No, it can't be! You're a fictional character!"

Luna's smile is calm, showing centuries of practice. However, Kathy can see stark terror behind her eyes.

"Kathy. My sister and I have chosen you. We must travel across the dimensions to help Equestria with a battle. A war."

Kathy raises an eyebrow. "How do I know I'm not dreaming?"

Luna raises a hoof. "Help us or not, I'm afraid I will have to teleport you to Equestria."

"What – or who will be waiting for me there?" Kathy asks.

"A friend of yours. Do not worry, but brace yourself," Luna warns. "Dimension-travelling is a serious form of transportation."

"Damn it!" Tim slams his fist onto the desk. _Why can't I contract that werewolf disease! Skyrim is sometimes so bucking difficult._

All of a sudden, a portal opens in from his computer. Startled, he jumps back several feet. He shields his eyes with his arms.

"WHAT THE BUCK?" he yells. He manages to keep the swearing at a minimum – his little cousin is over.

A shadow walks out from the blinding light.

"Tim is your name, right? We chose you. You must come to Equestria," pleads a pony. She is dark blue, light blue mane. Pretty face.

"Princess Luna?" Tim asks. "Wh-what the hell?" Luna smiles. Her poise is majestic, but Tim can feel anxiety coming off her in waves.

"I knew you would recognize me." Her gaze drops to sadness. "Please, Tim, you have to help me and all of Equestria! You must come with me – the Elements are to come soon. You must work together in friendship to defeat our enemy."

"Are you kidding?" Tim exclaims. "I would never leave my pony friends when they're in need. Besides, I've always wanted to go to Equestria!"

"So you will help us!" says Luna happily. "Oh thank you, you don't know how much this means to all ponies!" Her voice then turns sharp.

"But we must travel through dimensions. A friend of yours will be waiting in our dimension, dimension 931." She grimaces. "Brace yourself, it isn't an easy journey!"

**Two chappies in one day? You guys deserve it!**

**Don't review. I don't deserve it. I swear.**

…

**Okay, fine, it is un-author to tell readers not to review.**

**REVIEWREVIEWREVIEW!**

**Review Answers:**

**Soup2504: Thanx for the advice! Very constructive feedback. Review again for me soon? BTW 3 Soup forevar!**

**Emo Soul Eater Forever Strong: I hope this is what you expected! I am going to add in a little bit of intro to Ponyville before they set out to kill Nokomis. I promise I'll add some more stuff to the plot, it's just that I'm really busy.**

**Fuutachimaru: Best name evar! Anyways, thanx for the review :3 Glad you liked it!**

**The Reviewer: Sorry 'bout my arctic bears, it's not like I want them to write! They just do. In my imagination. Controlling me. Sort of.**

**Ponyiowa: He he he. Sorry I didn't update quite so soon. I don't deserve reviews…**


	3. Chapter 3: OMG I'm a Pony! Sort of!

**Fang: We can go on a candy binge again to G's and 7-Eleven! YAY! :D**

**Max: I much prefer Tim Hortons. White Hot Chocolate is delicious.**

**Me: God, you remind me so much of some of my friends…**

**Max: Well, duh. We're made up in your mind. And by analyzing your surroundings, you can – **

**Fang: Blah, blah, blah Mrs. Science.**

**Max: (bristling) Mrs. Science? I took school until Grade 3!**

**Fang: And I dropped out in Kindergarten!**

**Me: I took AP Kindergarten…**

**Max: …**

**Fang: Wow. And I thought we were stupid. :P**

**Me: Whatevs. Why are we talking about school when it's March Break? We have to like, splurge on online websites and stuff so we won't die of Internet Deprivation later!**

**Fang: Internet Deprivation?**

**Max: A serious illness only cured by a large amount of Nyan Cat.**

**Me: Symptoms: shaking, rocking back and forth, mumbling, eating too much, eating too little, thinking clouds are purple, and gummy bear addiction.**

**Fang: Never heard of it.**

**Max and I: *gasp***

**Chapter 3**

Kathy groans and holds her head.

"What the _pony_ happened?" _Am I in Equestria?_

"Dimension-travelling," says Luna dismissively. "Amateur training."

"What the buck, Kathy?" asks Tim. "Why are you here?" He's wincing as he gets up off the stone brick floor. _God, stupid vision turning black._

"Silence," orders Luna. "We must have a serious discussion with the Elements. But for now, you may rest and recollect your memories – sometimes dimension-travelling takes a toll on them."

Luna's gaze softens. "I must also give you this." She hands a silver pen to them. "If you ever wish to teleport back to your own world, click the top." She lowers her eyes. "But just to warn you, if you ever make that choice, that you will not ever have the power to come back."

Kathy and Tim nod solemnly. "Luna, you're doing us a favour, bringing us here. We are both… fans of yours." She shoots a quick look at Tim, so sharp that Tim almost misses it.

"Yes. Luna, we refuse to abandon you. When are the Elements com – "

His sentence is interrupted by a loud "Yee-haw, applewhippers!" and "Yeah, right Soarin'!"

"Applejack!" says a stern voice. "And you too, Soarin' and Rainbow. You know we are in Celestia's castle. We have to stay quiet and be respectful."

_Twilight?_ Kathy thinks.

"Luna, we have arriv – " Twilight stops dead when she reaches the humans. "Who are they? _What _are they?"

"Hi! Whatever you are, pleased to meet you!" Pinkie Pie rambles. "TWO big parties later! Oh boy, oh boy!" She jumps up and down, her pink mane bouncing.

"Pinkie Pie!" cries Tim. Pinkie raises an eyebrow questioningly. "Hey, you're cool and all, but how in the name of Celestia do you know me?" Tim grabs her hoof and shakes it rapidly.

"I'm your BIGGEST fan!" yells Tim. "Aw man, I can't believe I'm meeting you in person!"

"Okay, so which flavour should the cake be?" asks Pinkie excitedly. Kathy half expects Tim to be floundered with the sudden change of subject, but she's wrong as always.

"Chocolate with extra ice cream inside!" said Tim.

"This is all 'eartwarming 'and all, but don't y'all think we should… uh… discuss?" suggests Applejack.

"Yes. We came here to discuss of our sworn enemy, Nokomis, no?" asks Twilight. Luna takes back a step in surprise.

"Why yes, how did you – " Luna narrows her eyes. "You were given a sign too, weren't you?"

Twilight smiles grimly. "Yes. Of blood and ra – "

"No need to describe this now. I shall give you instructions on your journey," Luna interrupts.

A swish and that same sound of confident hoofsteps.

"Twilight Sparkle! My faithful student." Twilight nuzzles Celestia as she enters the room. "Princess Celestia! Please, is Equestria in danger?"

"Unfortunately yes," Celestia responds. "The humans here I believe are a brony and pegasister…"

"A bro what, and a pegasis what the _pony_?" asks Rainbow Dash. "Please, in normal pony language."

"They are fans of yours, from a different dimension." Twilight gapes. "But you can only travel to another dimension by – "

"It is possible," interrupts Luna. "But we are not here to discuss that. We are here to discuss our troubles on Nokomis. She has taken into evil days, more than usual…"

"Nokomis?" asks Applejack. "Who in the hay is that?"

"In pony tales you have read as fillies, you might have known her as the Dark Mist." All the ponies gasp.

"The Dark Mist?" mews Fluttershy. "Oh dear, oh dear…" Her pink hair falls over her face and she takes a step back off the floor.

"That is just an old pony's tale!" argues Soarin'. "Just a story." His mane, usually a big mess, is only slightly mussed up after sleep. However, a small cowlick accentuates his words.

"You thought that the Mare of the Moon was "just a story" as well, Soarin'," growls Twilight. She snorts and paws at the ground in frustration.

"Yes, but –" Soarin' persists.

"Silence!" Luna says, using her Royal Canterlot Voice.

"OMG! Do that again!" squeals Kathy.

Insert awkward silence here.

"Well, then," Celestia sighs. "I believe Nokomis has gathered an army during her dark days, and she wishes to besiege upon us." She brings a flip chart from behind the hallway.

"You see," Celestia explains, "around her headquarters is a mass of magic. This is dark magic, a lot like Discord's. It messes with your mind."

"Is Discord in cohorts with Nakawhata – y'know, the Dark Mist?" asks Applejack.

"Hopefully not," Celestia says, dragging the "not" part. "Anyways, as you can see, Fillydelphia will be hit first. We will be plotting some battalions there, but not too many. Bordering the sides are Manehattan and Appleloosa. We will definitely base battalions there."

"What about Ponyville?" asks Spitfire. She whips her pony phone out disrespectfully, the machine vibrating fiercely after some thousand messages. _It's the first thing she's said all morning,_ Soarin' thinks. _What a crabapple. Look at her – trussing her mane, checking herself in the mirror._

"Ponyville will be the center of attention," Celestia continues. "We will place the most battalions there, and we will also do so in bases such as the Stallion Range Mountains, and Coltdale. Possibly Neigh Orleans."

"And Canterlot?" prompts Soarin'.

"Our main headquarters," says Celestia grimly. "I will put a magical force field around Canterlot, Ponyville, Stallion Range, and Coltdale. The remaining cities I will provide with arms and battle plans."

"Woah woah woah!" Tim cries. "Wait, aren't we all friends here?" Luna's gaze darkens.

"I'm afraid not. Sometimes, friendship is inevitably going to _fail_. If you excuse me, and your naivety, I must organize the battle plans. Thank you." Luna coldly stalks out of the room.

"What did I say?" asks Tim, confused. Kathy sighs. _Boys._

"You must excuse my sister, she has been stressed lately, more than usual," Celestia replies formally. She drops back down to a kinder tone.

"But because all of you must get ready, as well as us, Kathy and Tim can stay and learn more from you as poni-"

"!" squeals Kathy. "OMGGGGGGG!" Celestia looks amused. Tim hasn't said anything. He's too busy dropping his jaw.

"But first, I wish to give you a pony form. It all depends on who you truly are." Kathy and Tim nod. "I don't wish to startle the rest of the ponies in Ponyville, so you will need a current form."

"I'll go first!" yells Tim. He steps up, and Celestia touches his shoulder with the tip of her horn.

A bright light slashes through everyone's vision. And, standing in front of Celestia, there is an earth pony. He is a deep sea green, and his mane is minty. His eyes shine of yellow, and tail has thick turquoise stripes in it.

"It's me, Tim!" he brays. "Wow, I look stunning!"

"Took the words right out of my mouth, dear!" Rarity assures him. "Why don't you stop by later, I simply _must_ make some clothing off your _inspirational _coat!"

"Go on, Kathy!" Tim cries. "It's really cool!"

"Of course!" she says back. She steps up cautiously. Celestia again, touches the shoulder with her horn.

Another flash of light.

"Wow." Tim has dropped his jaw already… again.

In place of the petite Asian girl is a pegasus. She is a light gray color, her mane a startling electric blue. Triangular bangs cover her forehead. Her eyes are what capture everyone, though. Her eyes are a mix of baby blue to thin turquoise, changing in the light.

"So…" Kathy prompts.

"Wow, you are really hot." Kathy raises one eyebrow.

"Aha ha ha ha…" Applejack mutters.

"Well, welcome to the team!" Rainbow Dash says. She grabs Kathy's hoof tightly, to show strength, but Kathy squeezes harder back. Rainbow grins. Already she can tell Kathy will be a good friend.

"I will arrange for Tim to be with one of the earth poni-"

"EMMEMEMEMEMEMMEMEOOHHHH MEMEMEMMEMEMEMEM!" squeals Pinkie Pie. "PPLLLLLEEAAAAASSEEEE?"

"Of course, Pinkie," says Celestia kindly. "And for Kathy – "

"I'll take her, no problemo," Rainbow Dash offers. She flaps her wings enthusiastically, but winces at the pain.

"Besides, we need to get ready for the journey and that means training her!"

"Train me!" scoffs Kathy in mock hurt. "Well, I – "

"Hey, you're getting dangerously close to my pride there," warns Rainbow jokingly.

"Good, it needs some deflating," Kathy retorts playfully.

"Alright, alright, break up the chick fight," says Soarin'.

"And exactly _who _invited you to be sexist?" asks both mares sharply. They grin at each other.

_Oh boy, this is going to be one looonnng journey. _Soarin' thinks.

**So guys… Bad? Good? I know I haven't been on in a while, but this is a good chance to take a look at my writing? Please?**

**Max: Pfft. Don't review. She doesn't deserve it.**

**Me: Max!**

**Fang: Ya, all she did was mooch around the igloo.**

**Me: Fang!**


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